Feb 15th...
Well, we have made it through one day without Derrick. ( I still have to make it through the night), but as far as Cael is concerned, it has been a whole day without daddy. This part is nothing new to him I guess, Derrick has been gone for short periods of time before, but I hope a whole year isn't too much for our little guy to handle. I need him to stay positive for my own sanity. I hate to ask so much of him at 2 years old, but he is the man of the house now and momma will definitely need his help in seeing the good side of some of the days we are about to face. Everyone keeps telling me the first few days and/or weeks are the hardest, and if I can keep it together through this part I will eventually fall into a "new normal" routine and the year will go by pretty fast. Is it wrong of me to want to rush Averi's first year of life? This is such a complicated emotion. I am so afraid of "missing" this next year of the kids' lives because I am trying to rush it along, or feeling like if we do anything big that we will be making Derrick jealous...I don't know. He has his computer with him and we are going to keep in contact the best we possibly can, so I think I need to just take a deep breath and take this deployment day by day. Wish me luck! And definitely keep my awesomely brave and strong husband in your thoughts!
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