Dance! Dance!

Jan 31st...

My goal today was to work in our bedroom and clean and organize all my scrapbooking stuff, and it almost happened! I turned on some Lady GaGa to get me in the cleaning mood and that attracted my little helper. It's hard to clean when you have Cael dancing in circles singing "Papa, Papa!" I had no choice but to put down what I was doing and join him.

I'm very proud of him!

Jan 30th...

Going active was a choice Derrick and I made together, he knew the possibilities of being deployed when he signed the contract. I thought I knew too, but after being in the reserves for 6 years and never having to go, I guess I just assumed it wasn't in the cards for us. Now here we are, only 5 days before he ships out and instead of focusing on my nerves, or worry, or fear, all I can think about is how proud I am of him. He really stepped up to the plate. In the reserves it's easy to slack off and forget why you joined in the first place because you only put the uniform on once a month and spend the majority of those days hanging around. Derrick has always been a pretty big joker. I wasn't worried about him in the least, but I can say that I was pleasantly surprised when he joined his new unit and slapped on his serious face. He instantly earned the respect of his entire platoon and has not once seemed like he doesn't want to be there. He gets up every morning before the sun and never complains or gripes about how tired he is. When he gets home, he helps me with anything I may need help with. And not once have I heard that he is not ready for this deployment. He is handling this terrifying situation so calmly and with such a level head...I am in awe of him. I wish I had his strength (I'll wish for his strength literally while he's gone and I try to rearrange the living room by myself,) but that's not the strength I mean today. Today I wish I had the kind of strength it takes to know you're doing the right thing for your family, even though it may be the last thing you want to do. He is the absolute best and the troops in Afghanistan should be happy he is coming to join them.

Snow?

Jan 29th...

For 2 days now, everyone and their mother has been talking about this awful snow storm that's coming, schools were already planning to be closed today and Derrick didn't have to go into work until 9:30. I held back a little laugh when the guy on the radio announced the "severe storm warning" and said we should be expecting almost 4 inches! I thought to myself "Really?" Back in Washington it could snow 6 feet and people hardly notice...every one still has to work, everyone still has to go to school. I had no clue that this tiny bit of snow could turn a town upside down like this. Derrick was off from work after only 2 hours today and there was no one at all on the roads, he even saw a 4 car pile-up in the Lowes parking lot! It was all fun and jokes for me and Derrick talking about how crazy everyone is acting...until we decided to order a pizza.

Me: "Yes I would like to make an order for delivery."

Pizza Hut Girl: "Oh, we're not delivering tonight."

Me: "Really? How come?"

Pizza Hut Girl: "Uh, the weather..."

I was absolutely speechless.

In all seriousness, if this is how bad the winters get here...I'm never moving!

***Update***

Ok, after I posted this the snow kept falling and we have about 6 inches now...so I will eat my words a little. BUT, that is no reason to shut down Pizza Hut!

A Big Decision

Jan 28th...

I had a lot of thinking to do today. I have been attempting to start school recently. I found the Art Institute of Tennessee, fell in love with it, and tried to dip my toes in the water... maybe see if it could work. Bottom line is, I think it could. It would be a stretch, but the photography program there is awesome and I would be really excited to do it. Aside from how great it would be, I decided to put it on the back burner for right now. I am still going to attend. I made that promise to myself already... just not right now. With Derrick leaving, I was looking to school as a chance to escape the reality of being alone. Something to take my mind off of it. I was bugging him so much about getting all the paperwork done, and worrying so much about getting in, that I stopped thinking about what Derrick is going through. That was not my intention in any way. I realized today that my family doesn't need me to run away. My kids don't need me to run away. I think about having the best days at school, and taking the most amazing pictures, and having no one to show them to when I get home. That's just not what I want. I would feel a whole lot better about everything if I waited until Derrick gets back. So that's what I am going to do. While he is away from us, I am going to be the best damn stay at home mom anyone has ever seen.... I will be the best damn student next year! :) I am coming AI, I promise!

Jan 27th...

Today was interesting to say the least. It was long...stressful...frustrating. Derrick called at 6:30 am to ask me why I didn't put the insurance cards in the car, that call woke up Cael who, on an early day, will sleep until 7:30. Averi stayed asleep thank goodness and after about 20 minutes of pretending I could sleep on the couch, I finally admitted defeat and put my glasses on. Do you ever have days where you actually get something accomplished before noon and you think to yourself; "Hey, maybe I COULD do this everyday..." Today was one of those. I had the dishes done before 10 am! It was a great feeling, my kitchen was clean and that gave me the motivation to get going on the rest of the house. The fact that I'm trying not to think about how we are going to pay for school, or about Derrick leaving, could have had something to do with my motivation...but we'll just say it was because I got the dishes done.

Holy Cow...Daycare!

Jan 26th...

Derrick had a pre-deployment briefing today and all the soldiers were encouraged to bring their wives along to hear the information, I was excited to go because I wanted to meet some other wives and get my foot in the FRG door, and plus, they have an onsite daycare center. I was so excited for cael to finally get to interact with other kids, I couldn't wait. As we were dropping the kids off I wasn't too worried about Averi, military installations are held to a higher standard when it comes to things like daycare and I felt very good about the employees there, but I did start to worry about what to do if Cael didn't want to stay, do I just hug and him and walk away? Do I stay with him hoping he will become more at ease and I can sneak out later? Do I bag the idea all together? I had absolutely nothing to worry about, I am actually the one who was bummed out when I dropped him off. He didn't even want to come back and give me a hug. He was so excited! There was another little boy a little older than him, 2 little girls (one of them screaming bloody murder, poor thing. She was still crying when we came back to pick him up) and Averi. The 3 women working there almost fought over Averi and she was out of her car seat before it even hit the ground. It felt so good to watch Cael have fun today that I feel a lot better about going to school!

Traveling to the Art Institute

Jan 25th...

I took a big step today and met with an administrative director at the Art Institute of Tennessee-Nashville today! The school is amazing and the photography imaging course is exactly what I am looking for! If all goes well financially I could be 3 years away from a Bachelor of fine arts degree and maybe even a career in portrait photography or photo journaling!!! I can't get my head too high into the clouds until I apply for all my scholarships and stuff, but here's hopin! And another high point of the day...I navigated my way through the twisted interstates of Nashville and back again and I didn't even get lost!

Jan 22nd...

Today caught me off guard emotionally. I have listening to the news about the earthquake in Haiti, but it hadn't yet hit just how much it hurt the people living there. I guess in an extremely selfish way, I decided not to dwell on it so the news wouldn't bring me down or make me start thinking about if anything happened to us. A coping mechanism I guess. But last night looking at the guide on TV I saw that the Haiti Telethon was on and I remembered hearing Ellen mention it on her show a few days before. I turned to it when I normally would find something less depressing to watch, and I watched the whole thing. There were celebrities there to answer phones and take donations, and I fell semi uncomfortable admitting that was a huge part of why I wanted to call in and donate. I didn't get a celebrity when I called, I got an average person named John to take my donation and when I got off the phone I broke down and cried. Not because I was disappointed, but because I was embarrassed about not caring more to begin with. That opened the bag of worms for me and then I was a non stop cry baby throughout the whole telethon, they showed a bunch of little kids and babies who had lost their parents in the earthquake, or still didn't know, and it makes my stomach hurt. I told Derrick that if we had enough money, he would have to literally chain me to the floor to keep me from adopting one them and bringing them home, to show them that even through all this sadness, they can still be loved, if not by their original family, then by a new one, but a family just the same. He said if we had to money he wouldn't have chained me down. I can only hope that someone would feel the same way if something were to happen to me or Derrick.

I didn't mean to write a book...but I think I grew up today.

Jan 23rd...

Confession, Derrick took this picture. He has been sorting out all of his gear, getting ready for his deployment and whether he needs or not, he has a helper! I love this picture.

Jan 24th...

Last night, I went to Kohls with my 15% off coupon from my e-mail, I had my heart set on those exercise shoes with the rounded bottoms. I realize they may be a tad dorky looking, but I don't know a single person here, and I hardly leave the house. I don't ever take the time to put in my Crunchless Abs DVD while the kids are napping, and I don't want to lie to myself anymore saying, tomorrow I will start. Instead, I figure I can walk around my house all day long, chasing after cael and playing games, plus the occasional trip to the grocery store, and as long as I am wearing those shoes...Booyah! They will take the jiggle right out of my butt. right? Whoa, got a little off track there, sorry. Anyways, they didn't have my size, so I decided to get something for Cael instead. All there toys and games were buy one get one 1/2 off and I found him these puzzles where all the animals have the same shaped piece that comes out so you can mix and match. They were am impulse buy, but I am happy today that he likes them and has been playing with them all day.

Catching Up! (7)

Jan 19th...

Today is picture hanging day, which means we are on to the finishing touches of moving into our house! There has been a stack of picture frames following me from house to house the past few years with old out dated pictures, or none at all, and I have never felt like we were home enough to hang them. Well I finally do. I have a new printer and I filled them all up and Derrick actually helped me hang them up on his lunch break! Little things like this make me feel so good about my life. It makes me feel organized. I used to tell my mom that if something happened to me, the Behavioral Analysis Unit would have no clue I had a happy marriage and 2 beautiful kids because I had no pictures....but they could figure me out now!

Jan 20th...

I don't even have adequate words to describe how much I love this picture. Anyone who knows Cael knows how well this picture embodies his personality perfectly. He is such a thinker, he takes everything in and figures things out before he shows much expression. We just had our garbage can delivered and I got him all dressed to go outside with me and help take the garbage out. After words he wanted to go into the backyard and my first instinct was to say no because it had rained and was icky out, but then I remembered this photo challenge and realized I didn't have a picture of the day yet. When you think about it, this challenge is not only meant to keep track of what goes on day to day, but also to provide motivation to get up and actually make something of the days before they pass. Thanks Cael for making spend and hour out in the backyard watching you explore and play with Jo. The dirt on the nose? Don't ask me. I think something in a boy's genetic code makes dirt appear all over there face the second they walk out the door.

Jan 21st...

If I had a plate of cookies baked and ready to hand out, I would have given them all to the internet man! I thought our set-up appointment was yesterday so the extra day was already killing me, and then knowing in the back of my mind that I would be, without a doubt, spending all day staring out the window for him to get here was so frustrating! Much to my surprise, my doorbell rang a 9:00 am and there he was! He had everything hooked up in 20 minutes and said I was good to go as soon as AT&T shipped the modem to me. Ya right, when Derrick got home and he said no way can we wait another week for internet, and he went down to Best Buy and bought us one that night! :) I love spending all day with my two babies and I don't ever have any reason to ignore them and play bejeweled for an hour and a half while talking to my friends on facebook...that being said, it was a good day today.

Catching Up! (6)

Jan 16th...

Averi Annabelle's first on camera smile! I had such a hard time taking a picture of a smile because she is just learning so I have to catch her at the right time and be super quick. I love this picture because her whole face is lighting up. She looks like she has so much happiness she can't smile big enough and that melts my heart. A little blurry, maybe but all the soft pink makes it look so perfect to me...i love it.

Jan 17th...

This would be Swanky replacing Toy Story blanket I mentioned in an earlier picture. He loves to have me spread it out on the floor and we stand on everyones faces. I can't remember now, but I sure hope I appreciated the little things and made my own fun as a kid like he does now.

Jan 18th...

I decided to let Cael help me cook dinner tonight in the hopes that it might make him more excited to actually eat dinner, which he hasn't done in weeks. (Spoiler alert! It didn't work) I turned around to put water in a pot for the potatoes and when I looked back, this is what I got. The peas were in the pan, the can opener was tossed aside and he had on an oven mitt. I guess he knew what he was doing and he didn't need any help from me!

Catching Up! (5)

Jan 13th...

Our 2nd priority after the computer was (for sanity reasons, as well as my butt starting to hurt from our lawn chairs, ) A couch! We decided with 2 small kids, we didn't want anything fancy. We weren't worried about the look or the functionality, we just wanted a plain jane, good for sitting on, couch. I think that mindset served us well because our first stop was Big Lots to find something cheap and we found the couch of our dreams! I didn't even know I had a "couch of my dreams" until I saw this bad boy! It's humongous and goes around a corner, so it looks really nice in our living room. Plus it's microfiber so grape juice beads up and rolls right off!

Jan 14th...

Laundry! The piles and piles of dirty clothes are now piles and piles of clean folded clothes because the kids still don't have dressers! It feels so good to be finally turning this house into our home, with all the everything a home really needs. I went to the laundromat one day because I couldn't take it anymore. Derrick was home, so I left the kids (I'm no idiot) and headed off to wash our clothes. Can you believe it cost $2 per washer load!?! I was shocked, and those were the old ricketys, the big fancy ones were $4.50!!! Not to mention drying, one quarter for 6 minutes...my goodness. I got a lot of my book read (Dean Koontz' Frankentein Book 3, read them, you won't regret it!) and I heard my first genuine Tennessee accent! But those weren't enough reward for me...I didn't go back.

Jan 15th...

I took this picture because this is literally what Derrick and I did all day today! We took turns all day long. One of us actually being a parent, keeping up with Cael, feeding and changing Averi, cooking, washing the dishes, etc. While the other one slipped blissfully into the world of Sims where days only last a few minutes and job promotions come everyday as long as you stay happy! As addicted as we let ourselves get, and for as much fun as were having...we looked at each other before bed and just shook our heads. It was one of those days where you look at the clock and go "Midnight!?!? I haven't even had breakfast yet..."

Catching Up! (4)

Jan 10th...

This picture is huge for me. This is a box that I packed to give to Good Will and there are 2 more just like it. I decided that since this is a "new life" for us down in TN, I need to get rid of some of my baggage. I don't even know how many stuffed bears I collected as a kid, but the number is big! Granted, not all of them made the trip with us, some got left behind unintentionally in storage at my parents house, but almost everyone that made the trip down here went into these boxes! Once I made the big move and started saying goodbye to the bears, the rest was easy, books, pictures from high school, old trinkets and momentos that I could care less about and have just been following me around from one storage shed to the next...all gone! I let myself keep one box to fill with stuff I thought I might actually miss...other than that, toodleoo junk!

Jan 11th...

Today we got a surpise chunk of money in the bank to compensate our trip, and one of our top priorities was a new computer, so when Derrick leaves for Afghanistan he can know that I have a good, fast computer to keep in touch with him the best I can. He plans on getting a laptop once he's there, so now I will be able to upload pictures and videos of our kids to help keep him closer to home. We actually had to buy and return every piece a computer could possibly have before they dummies at Best Buy finally sold us one that wasn't off the junk pile, but it's all done and over with and now are computer rocks!

Jan 12th...

Cael loves Toy Story (even though he's never seen the movie, I can't find it ANYWHERE.) I bought him a Toy Story zip-up jacket today and he looked so cute I wanted that to be my picture of the day. This was the best I could get out of him. He would stand for me and say "Cheese!" and before he was even done saying it, he was in my lap trying to see the picture I didn't have time to take. I just went with it and took what I could.

Catching Up! (3)

Jan 7th...

Cael wasn't in the mood to take his nap today, so I set up his blankets in a moving box with his turtle nightlight that shines stars on the ceiling. I didn't think he would actually nap in there, but he proved me wrong when I stuck my head in to check on him a few minutes later. He makes me smile every day, but sometimes it's more of a laugh.

Jan 8th...

This is a filler picture, there was no big accomplishment or something interesting happening today, so I decided to try and get one of those awesome "baby feet" pictures that everyone can seem to take but me. It took a few tries, and it will look even better when I black and white it, but I'm just happy to get her toes in focus.

Jan 9th...

WoHoo! Our crap is here! We have been living on 4 plastic lawn chairs up until this point. Cael had his bed, Averi had her changing table, and we had our TV... other than that it was bare bones at our house. But...at least it was clean.

Catching Up! (2)

Jan 4th...

Oh my goodness, the Swanky! My son Cael adores this blanket. My nieces all had one as babies, so naturally my family got one for mine. He took this blanket everywhere he went, he didn't need it to fall asleep...but it made the process a tad smoother! Anyways, on the drive down here to Tennessee I made sure he had it with him in his carseat in the backseat of my car so he would have some comfort on what was bound to be a very uncomfortable trip. Not 6 hours into the trip, my little bud got car sick and ALL of the caramel corn my sister gave him for a road-trip snack came back up all over his precious blanket! No big deal right? Stick it in a plastic bag, change his clothes, go buy an air freshener...worst case scenario, he's a little crankier for the drive, right? WRONG! He was just fine on the drive, perfect actually, and I was relieved. The swanky did not bode so well. 6 days cooped up in a bag, and the 2 weeks without a washing machine...that blanket got so stinkin moldy! I have never felt like a worse mother in my life, why didn't I at least rinse it off at the gas station where it happened? I scrubbed and scrubbed, but those spots aren't going anywhere. I bought him a nice big Toy Story blanket to replace it and he is happy as a clam. Me? I just can't let go...I'll probably hang onto it for at least another year...

Jan 5th...

I'll be honest, I couldn't think of a picture today. Instead of thinking about something we were doing, I tried to focus on something we had, and I thought about these magnets. My niece has these at her house and they help kids to learn their letters and sing the alphabet, and whenever we went over to there house you could bet money that Cael would camp out in front of the refrigerator and play with those all day long. I didn't ever want them for our house because I had one of those kitchens that is cut off from the rest of the house and I didn't like him playing in there all alone. My sister must have known we would have more kid-friendly fridge placement in our new house because she got them for him for Christmas! He plays with them ALL the time...I have to be honest and say that I have contemplated taking the batteries out! He puts the letters in and pushes them over and over so instead of learning what sound the letter makes, he hears "A, A A A A A A A A A A A" Derrick says that thing is only teaching him how to stutter lol!

Jan 6th...

I bought this purse way back in October at a high school craft fair. The lady had a bunch of them, all made from different pairs of pants. I think it's really cute and I am always thinking I am in need of a new purse, so I bought it. Well...3 months later I filled it! What an accomplishment! I feel like a got a lot done today.

Catching Up!

*Alright!Project 365 is underway, I hope everyone enjoys this experience with me! I am a 24 year old, mother of 2 and my husband is deploying to Afghanistan for the first time. He will be gone until next February, and lord knows I am going to need an outlet sometimes! Be it to vent, cry, express my loneliness, or show the world whatever cute things my kids do, just for the sake of showing someone...I think this blog will keep me company when I need it most, so I plan to post a new picture everyday! Family, friends, and Derrick, this is all for you. It was hard for us to move across the country, but I know it's hard for you guys too, and this is just one way I could think of to let you know that we are OK. Since January is almost over, I have some catching up to do! I will post all the pictures I have so far with their journaling, and I am determined to have them done by tonight, tomorrow I can start fresh!

Jan 1st...
Our new house! We have been official Tennessee residents since December 28th and so far all is good. My husband Derrick is in the Army and has been stationed here so we packed up the car, said goodbye to the west coast and everyone we love, and headed East. After a 6 day driving adventure (to say the least) with 2 small children, we are finally home and it feels awesome! Now I just need to meet the neighbors...why does that seem so scary?

Jan 2nd...

For New Years Eve, Derrick wanted to just hang out and watch a movie. We put the kids to bed and since all our DVD's and our furniture weren't going to be delivered for a few more weeks, we moved the air mattress into the empty living room and I ran to Wal*Mart to buy us a movie. After finally picking one (Year One with Jack Black and Micheal Cera...Loved it!) I felt the need to do some random shopping (not a smart idea on our budget, but oh well) and found these insanely dorky yet, for some reason, cute underwear and could not stop laughing! I had to buy them for him. You should have seen his face when I walked in the door with them! He wore them the whole next day just to humor me, but said he felt like a 6 year old boy and I was never to "impulse shop" for him again! I chose them for today's picture because I want to focus on not forgetting the small stuff that happens this year, and these will probably be stuck in a drawer somewhere and never seen again.

Jan 3rd...

Today's picture is not the flashiest, and it does nothing to show any photography skills I may have...but it means a lot to me, and it was a hard decision to post. Today is the day I switched my baby girl to formula. I'm not a breastfeeding guru by any means, my son was formula fed as a baby, and the main reason for that was because I was scared. With Averi I decided I wanted to give breastfeeding a try and I had such a feeling of accomplishment and a very loving, strong bond with her that it broke my heart when at 2 months it seemed to not be enough. I hadn't decided just how long I was going to breastfeed her for, but I would have liked to have been the one to make the decision to stop.